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Maybe you’ve tried and failed at routines more times than you can count. Or maybe your schedule changes so much that you just give up on routines all together. People don’t generally try to fail at routines, it just happens.
I can’t tell you how many times I have just gotten sick and tired of being sick and tired and decide to do something new. I decided I was going to eat healthy, pay off student loans, have me time every morning, and keep my house spotless. This was all going to happen overnight of course.
You can change that much overnight, right? Here’s what really happens, you start out all gung-ho and excited to start. You are so excited, you probably wake up a little earlier than normal the first day because this day is going to be different, you just know it! You are going to be a different person TODAY!
You go through the day and you are on cloud nine because you feel a little different. Yesterday everything was going wrong and today it is all changing! You do most of the routine the first day. You are so into it that you are barking orders at everyone and watching the time like a hawk because you just have to fit all of these into the day. The first day has to be perfect because today things are changing.
Then two days later, you can’t keep up. You don’t do as well as you did the first day. The third day comes, and you do even less. As the days go on, you do less and less until eventually, you are back where you started. You feel like a failure. You think to yourself; routines are so easy so why can’t I just get it right?
You, my friend, are not a failure. You are just doing routines wrong. You are going about it the wrong way. It won’t work. No one could make that scenario happen even someone who has been doing routines for years! It’s not you!! It’s your process.
You can learn how to implement and maintain routines that stick. You can change the narrative in your head that you aren’t good with routines. You can change and be successful with routines in the future.
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Here are some reasons you fail at routines:
You don’t have accountability.
You need to have accountability. Having accountability increases your likelihood of success. You might not be in the position to be accountable to yourself at first, but you will be accountable to someone else. Remember accountability partners? Maybe you’ve had one in the past.
Some other benefits to having accountability :
- Keeps you engaged
- Keeps you responsible
- Keeps you on the path to success
- Validates your feelings and ideas
You don’t make time
One of the reasons you fail at routines is because you don’t take the time to start. You have to have a little bit of time to complete the routines. If you are already doing routines, you have to make sure you continue to make time to complete the routines.
This is one of the biggest challenges is we make them too complex. You cannot go from no routines (or limited routines) to a rigid and strict routine overnight. It won’t happen. You are setting yourself up for failure if you think you can do that.
Don’t have a plan
You don’t know where you’re going. You don’t have the end in mind. You just leave your house without knowing where you’re driving. You have to figure out what you want the result to be (your ideal vision) and then work backward.
You do too many new things at a time
You can’t start too many new things at one time. It takes time to do new things. The time it takes is up to you. Some things might take two weeks to stick and some might stick after a week. You only need to start 1-2 new things a week. Do them for a week and then measure where you are. If you feel like you’re doing okay and consistent with the new things, add 1-2 more. Don’t go crazy. It might seem like a slower process (because it is), but you can either be patient and add the new things on slower or you can keep starting and failing because you’re doing too many new things at one time, the choice is yours.
This is a big struggle for me. You have to be realistic. You can’t go from having barely a 3-step morning routine and waking up late to waking up an hour earlier every morning for a 10-step morning me-time ritual overnight. You also can’t do two hours’ worth of tasks in a one-hour time frame. You are failing ahead of time. You HAVE to be realistic.
You let perfectionism get in the way. You worry about waiting for the perfect right time to start routines and that day never comes. Or you do the routine perfectly on the first day and then on the second day, realize you don’t have an hour to spare during that time frame, so instead of doing what you have time for, you just stop and don’t do anything.
Self-sabotage (according to Healthline.com) is the behavior or thought patterns that hold you back and prevent you from doing what you want to do.
So, basically, you are causing yourself to fail. Ways to self-sabotage yourself are procrastination, perfectionism, not being realistic, limiting beliefs, comparison, negativity, ignoring your problems, etc.
When you are doing any of these forms of self-sabotage, you are failing ahead of time. You are causing yourself to fail by your thought patterns.
Limiting beliefs (according to ChangingMinds.org) are things that constrain us in some way. It is a belief that we have to cause us not to move forward and be able to do whatever when want to do.
Examples of limiting beliefs with routines:
- I’m just not good at routines.
- I’m not into strict schedules.
- I’ve never been able to do routines anyway, so it doesn’t matter.
- Routines just don’t work for me.
- Routines are way too complicated.
- My life will always be a mess so there’s no point in trying.
- Routines take up too much time.
- Routines limit you.
- What I’m doing right now is just fine.
- I don’t have time for routines.
- None of these thoughts or beliefs will lead you into success with routines. They will hold you back from being able to be successful with routines.
You have to evaluate, especially when you are doing something brand new. If you are doing something that isn’t working, but you don’t stop to see what’s going on and try to fix it, you aren’t going to be successful. More than likely you are going to stop and give up because you think the process just doesn’t work for you. This isn’t true, you just need to figure out why the routine isn’t working for you and fix it.
You can change the negative narrative in your head and be successful with routines. You can be successful with routines even if you haven’t been in the past. You can start today. You can succeed. We are starting a new challenge to help you with routines. It’s called 5 Days to Transform Your Mornings. It’s going to be epic, so you need to join the waitlist nowhere. LINK TO WAITLIST FOR ROUTINES CHALLENGE
If you want more help with being successful at routines, sign up for our 30 Minutes to a More Successful Morning Checklist HERE or below. It’s free and will help you take your mornings from chaos to controlled in just a few minutes a day. Just sign up below and it will be on its way to your inbox.